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As soon as I got home from work today, I knew something was wrong. Susan greeted me at the door, but the look on her face was not a happy one.
Susan>> Honey...
Susan>> We need to talk...
Immediately, my heart sank. There has never been a good conversation that started with the words "we need to talk".
You never "need" to talk about the good stuff.
It's never:
Person>> We need to talk...
Person>> You're getting a promotion.
Or:
Person>> We need to talk...
Person>> You just won a million dollars.
No, it's always:
Person>> We need to talk...
Person>> And by talk I mean I'm going to tear out your heart, show it to you, and then step on it.
Sigh.
Anyway, back to our story...
Susan>> Honey...
Susan>> We need to talk...
[GM]Dave>> Oh, crap.
Susan>> What?
Susan>> What's wrong?
[GM]Dave>> This is going to be bad.
Susan>> Why would you say that?
[GM]Dave>> Everytime you say that, something bad happens.
[GM]Dave>> It is the harbinger of my doom.
Susan>> That's not true.
[GM]Dave>> Well, is it good news?
Susan>> ...
Susan>> Not exactly...
[GM]Dave>> See? Told you.
[GM]Dave>> Harbinger, doom, me.
Susan>> It's just...
[GM]Dave>> What is it?
[GM]Dave>> It can't be that bad.
Silence.
[GM]Dave>> Or maybe it is.
[GM]Dave>> Crap.
Susan>> I don't know how to explain this.
Susan>> I did something terrible.
Good news: I'm not in trouble.
Bad news: When a woman admits to doing something terrible, it's very, very, very bad news.
[GM]Dave>> ... How terrible?
Silence.
[GM]Dave>> Crap.
Susan>> I didn't mean for this to...
Susan>> It just...
Susan>> It just happened.
Oh damn.
I knew what she was going to tell me. I could see it in her face, her eyes.
She had cheated on me.
I felt my heart lurch in my chest and wondered for a second if a man could die from a heart break.
There is no pain more agonizing, more terrible, more complete than knowing the person that you love has been with someone else. I cannot even begin to imagine anything as horrible as that.
She might as well have just reached in my chest and tore my heart out. It might have hurt less.
The fact that she could have cheated on me with another man was just... unimaginable. I don't think anything could have been worse than that.
But I had to hear it from her.
[GM]Dave>> What...
[GM]Dave>> What happened?
Susan>> I was out the other morning...
Susan>> You were at work...
Susan>> And...
She started to cry.
I wanted to.
[GM]Dave>> Go on.
[GM]Dave>> Tell me.
Susan>> I was shopping.
Susan>> Just picking up a few things and...
Susan>> I wasn't planning it, you know.
Susan>> I swear I wasn't planning for it to happen.
[GM]Dave>> What happened?
Susan>> I...
Susan>> I...
[GM]Dave>> Say it.
Here it was.
This was the moment when she would tear my heart out with just a few words.
Susan>> I tried Warcraft.
...
...
That's just freakin' wrong.
Susan>> Honey...
Susan>> Talk to me.
[GM]Dave>> How could you?
[GM]Dave>> HOW COULD YOU?!
Susan>> It just happened.
[GM]Dave>> NO IT DIDN'T!
[GM]Dave>> YOU WANTED IT TO HAPPEN!
Susan>> No, I didn't.
[GM]Dave>> YES, YOU DID!
[GM]Dave>> I...
[GM]Dave>> I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!
Susan>> Honey, calm down.
[GM]Dave>> DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!
Susan>> It didn't mean anything.
Susan>> It was just a free trial.
[GM]Dave>> Did you...
[GM]Dave>> Did you... go on a raid?
Susan>> ...
[GM]Dave>> OH GOD!!!
Susan>> Let me explain.
[GM]Dave>> I don't want to hear it.
[GM]Dave>> Just leave me alone.
I can't believe she could do something so terrible.
I mean couldn't she have just cheated on me or something?
Sleeping with another man would have been bad, but Warcraft?!
Now, that hurt.
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